gay teen
well here’s the story, About five weeks ago I was sitting alone at home just sitting there stoned thinking like I normally do when no one is there to talk to (Amanda was at work). As I sat there, I started to think about what it would be like to be in a relationship with another man. I started to think about my gay friends and how happy they looked when they were with thier boyfriends. I thought, “Oh this is just normal stoned mind wandering. Nothing to think too much about,” but as the weeks went on, and I spent more time trying to get these thoughts out of my mind (they are not normal for me to have) I couldn’t. For five weeks now, exactly five weeks as a matter of fact being that today is friday, I have had these thoughts. I love Amanda, we are going to get married (see another post..forgot to update it we are having the wedding in three weeks, ), but I have no explanation for these other thoughts. It’s not like I am thinking about a specific guy or thinking about cheating, just about the possibility of a relationship. I don’t want to leave Amanda, maybe it’s just pre-marriage jitters but this has carried on for too long, and started before we made the decision so I don’t know what this is. Sorry to keep going, but I just cant express this right. let s just say this, I love Amanda with all my heart, she’s hopefully the only one I will, but I keep thinking I’d be happy with another guy. Not happier, but happy. Am I gay, bi, or what? I don’t know what to think, or if I should tell her. We’ve always been open about sex, even swinging a few times, but never with the same sex. I think she would be open to me being bi, but…who knows. Why would these have to pick now of all times to come to light, but they did and it’s time for me to deal with the possiblity. I know seriousness like this is not always welcome on a good feelings forum but if any of you have any advice I’d really appriciate it. Thanks Peace, love, and health, Al